Our immigration laws are creating chaos and fear in the lives of immigrants and citizens. Our current members of Congress must look deep into that well of wisdom, which Stephen Shick suggests our founders of the United States of America had done by crafting dreams of democracy out of chaos. Elected officials must change the immigration laws that break families and break hearts, and stand on the side of love with immigrant families.

This standing on the side of love and walking the talk of justice can be exhausting but oh so satisfying! I am proud of having participated in the Standing on the Side of Love with Immigrant Families Public Witness Rally in Support of Comprehensive Immigration Reform at the Federal Building in San Diego.

Rev. Dr. Arvid Straube of First UU Church of San Diego offered an opening prayer in which he invoked the inherent worth and dignity of each person. Rev Peter Morales, President of the Unitarian Universalist Association, drew the distinction between immigration as a legal issue and a moral issue. He reminded us that throughout our history there have been laws that, while legal, were immoral. I hear a call!

Bishop Brenda Evans Cooper of Christ Chapel World Ministry provided an interfaith perspective that none of us and no immigrant should give up hope in a quest for freedom. I realized that interfaith does not mean we all believe alike, but we can all join in upholding the right of all persons, regardless of place of birth, to freedom.

A litany was presented by UU ministers, Rev Kathleen Green and Rev David Miller, to which the crowd responded “I stand on the side of love.” The power of public response was transforming for me. It reminded me that I am not in this alone and that together we do make a difference.

Enrique Morones, founder of Border Angels, called on all of us as citizens of the world to recognize that those seeking refuge in the United States of America are human beings and should be treated humanely regardless of the route their journey as taken them. I am emboldened by his passion for human rights, not as an ideal, but as a practice. Border Angels provides water and clothing for migrants in the desert. Over 4000 people have died since 1994. The image of one woman, Leticia, who died in the arms of her 15 year old son while crossing through the desert will not leave me.

Rev. Dr. Beth Johnson of Palormar UU Fellowship provided a closing prayer in which she invoked that love and compassion should be our guide, and that sometimes breaking a law while standing for love is a result of unjust laws.

I have been transformed by the events over four days of witness in San Diego. What I hold most in my heart is a five year old U.S. citizen child, who well could have been the child of Jorge, the man whom Adam, Kathy, Dick, Mar, Michanne, and I met at the border in Mexico, who came up to me and with all the courage she could muster, looked me directly in the eyes and asked “When will you bring my papa home?” I am standing on the side of love for this child and all the immigrant families who are broken by our broken immigration laws.
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We were entertained by Greg Brown and Dave Ploeser of North Crust Blue-geois Band, and by singer/song writer Chris Hassett, who wrote a song, “A Strange Kind of Gratitude” for the occasion. See the lyrics at www.chrishassett.com.
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Join the National March for America in Washington, D.C. on March 21st. More information here.

This is the fourth in a blog series, chronicling the adventures of the Standing on the Side of Love Campaign in San Diego between Thursday, February 25th and Sunday, February 28th. This blog is written by Martin Kruming, who is building bonds between churches to become more effective justice advocates. On Saturday, February 27th, he helped organize a gathering of six local Unitarian Universalist Congregations for a Social Justice Conference.

I’ve always realized the power and impact of a penny. When I spot one on a sidewalk, in an airport or at a grocery store, I’ll pick it up. By themselves, pennies don’t buy much these days; but you put them with other pennies and now you’re on to something. Pool them with nickels, dimes, quarters and even a $20.00 bill that my wife found in the bushes during a walk, and you’ve really got something. It’s the same story with Unitarian Universalist churches and social justice work. Each one is powerful and can get things done but together a Cluster or group of them can do so much more for the homeless, marriage equality, immigrants, the environment – you name it. And when Unitarian Universalists link with other churches, people and groups, the possibilities soar.

Saturday, February 27th, some 30 Unitarian Universalist ministers and lay leaders spent five hours together at Palomar UU Fellowship in Vista, about 40 miles north of downtown San Diego to talk about social justice and what we could do together that would have an impact on the entire county. What if we made bowls and fed homeless families? What if we read to grade school kids at nearby Camp Pendleton whose Marine moms or dads were fighting in Afghanistan and Iraq? What if we gathered clothes, computers and more for colonias in Tijuana? Imagine what six churches together rather than one church alone – sort of a 6 vs. 1 concept. Toward the end of Saturday’s 1st Annual Social Justice Conference, we had the plan as well as the vision. We’ve had a San Diego County Cluster for four years but social justice has always been an individual church story – until today.

Rev. Dr. Beth Johnson, the minister at Palomar, probably put it best: “It’s obvious that we can do more together than we can do alone. We can continue to be that liberal, progressive beacon in San Diego County. This is a special and auspicious day.”

I was fascinated to hear UUs in the room share their passion for social justice and the words they used to describe it. Caring and need were at the top of the list. As we listened to Adam Gerhardstein talk during lunch of Subway sandwiches about the Standing On the Side of Love Campaign, we knew how powerful this 6 vs.1 concept was and how our work in San Diego is really all about love. Ironically, during our Social Justice Weekend a noose was found hanging in the library at the University of California at San Diego campus, just a few miles south.

Pennies. They’re the building blocks; they’re the connectors; they’re the “little people” in the world of millions, billions and trillions. Later that week, as I headed to a meeting in downtown San Diego, I spotted a penny on the sidewalk. I bent down, picked it up and when I got home dropped it into my 2010 Trader Joe’s coffee can of coins.

On the way to work yesterday, the first day gay and lesbian couples could apply for marriage licenses in D.C., Rev. Rob Hardies called me and said, “Fred Phelps is at the courthouse and we need Standing on the Side of Love.” So as soon as I got in the office, my colleague Orelia Busch and I grabbed our banner, signs, buttons and wallet cards that say, “We believe homophobia, not homosexuality, is a sin,” and headed out.

When we arrived at the courthouse it was a media feeding frenzy. Videographers, photographers, people with tape recorders, bounced from one loud voice to another and mobbed any couple coming out of the courthouse. The couples were positively glowing. They were radiating love and energy that overshadowed all the craziness around them. The hate was there, and being loudly proclaimed, but love had already won.

My favorite moment of the morning occurred while a huge media mob swarmed around two protesters yelling at each other, not realizing that they were on the same side. When I looked past the media mob, over by the door of the courthouse, I saw a man get down on one knee, look in his partner’s eyes, and, while I couldn’t hear them, I am 100% sure that he proposed. His partner began to cry, then the man got up from his knees and they kissed. A lone photographer noticed this proposal and went running over to capture it, but he was too late.

Witnessing that proposal, on that momentous day, was one of the great privileges of my life. I wish you could have been there with me, but here is a short video that will at least give you glimpse of what that day was like.

I know that when I take people to see Mexico, the Mexico that I see, it is a transformational experience. It’s not easy though. I have spent a lot of time thinking about how best to convey this experience for others, paint a rosy picture, not show them some areas, or support their stereotypes. Lots of paths that can be taken toward understanding. Over the past 5 years, I have seen many different reactions and emotions; sadness, anger, judgement, joy to name a few. My current approach is to just hold a space of compassion for everyone involved. This is how I embarked on the day with Adam, Dick, Dan, Mar and Michanne squeezing into my AWD Toyota. Curious what this adventure will bring…….

We traveled to Colonia Cumbres, where I have built 9 homes for families that truly needed good homes but were too poor to afford them. I love the name of the home program, Casas de Luz, having windows in each of these homes brings light into what was previously cave like conditions.

We go to Lulu’s bright blue home with her three large windows and see Daniel, 3 years old, smiling. When I first met him he suffered from asthma caused by the mold in their home, he never smiled. Lulu’s family has a hard life but her home is always neat; she takes great pride in owning it. It’s nice to know that I played a part in providing her some contentment.

In January of 2009, I was asked if I was interested in supporting Colonia Carretas in helping them become a community. Over the past year I have delivered weekly donations, raised funds for a new community center, and heard their struggles in community development. There are currently 30 families that are part of this squatter’s canyon of homes.

We drive up to the community a couple of hours late and there are 25 people waiting for us. There is excitement, to receive “Standing on the Side of Love” pins, and caution, who are these people with me.

We are on the lot that we hope to have become the new community center. The community has cleared the land by hand, forming a human chain to move the rocks. They have been working hard in the hope of having a better life. They see us as providing some hope for the future. I feel a big responsibility when I hear them talk about how hard their lives are and what they need. While they would love new homes, we are focusing on building a community center and entrepreneur development. Some of the women have made things to show us. There are scarves, tortilla holders, bags; all made from remnants brought down from the US. Adam purchased the perfect rainbow scarf to wear for his sermon on Sunday. I was touched deeply when they asked him to pray for them and their families. I felt such joy seeing Mar doing Cat’s cradle and Adam doing magic tricks with the kids.

It brings me such joy visiting my friends in the Colonias. This is my spiritual practice that awakens me to what’s really important and nourishes me with each visit. I will continue facilitating the alchemy of castoffs becoming gold across the border.

Kathy Faller, Dick Eiden and Dan Stracka pick me up at the hotel and we drive to South Bay Unitarian Universalist Church in Chula Vista. I’d been told the church is in a strip mall next to a tattoo parlor, but the only thing I notice when I pull up is the sign on the door, “Bilingual Services Sunday/Domingo,” and a smaller sign down below, “Standing on the Side of Love with Immigrant Families.” I am definitely in the right place.

Mar Cardenas and Michanne Hoctor-Thompson meet us at South Bay and fill the remaining two seats in our mini-van.

Ten minutes later I learn a valuable lesson: do not videotape while driving through a border station. What I thought would be nice montage footage driving across the border, I end up erasing under the supervision of a Mexican border agent. Oops!

We enter Tijuana and begin driving along the border wall towards the Playas (beach) where the border wall ends in the ocean. In Tijuana, there are actually two border walls. The old one made of sheet metal and wire mesh followed by 50 feet of no-mans land and the new border wall made of tall cylindrical shafts shooting up in the air. As we drive along the wall we see hummers, trucks and SUVs patrolling the U.S. side of the border and a sand bag bunker in the middle of no-man’s land. Mar tells me the wall runs for 800 miles along the border.

When we arrive at the Playas, I have three experiences that profoundly change how I view immigration, immigrants and the United States.

First, the very first person I meet in Mexico is named Jorge. He stood at the border wall looking into the United States. He begins telling us his story and I am so moved I ask to tape him so that the world could witness his reality, one that so many immigrant families share. Here is Jorge’s story:

Jorge may not have had the proper documents to be in the U.S. or have a driver’s license, but he did have a family, a job, and a life. After 17 years in the U.S. he was deported and all of that was destroyed. It hits me hard – there is something profoundly wrong with my country’s immigration policy.

Second, Mar Cardenas points to the place where the wall runs into the ocean and tells me about the time when it wasn’t yet constructed and was demarcated by just a rope, but everyone was expected to treat that rope like a wall and never cross it, not even with a toe.

In an act of faithful resistance, people of faith gathered on both sides of the rope to worship. A Mexican priest reached across the rope to give communion to a U.S. citizen and was promptly arrested. Not even the body of Christ could cross that border.

Third, Mar volunteers with an organization called Border Angles. They save lives everyday by placing water, blankets and clothes in the desert where immigrants cross the border, risking their lives to reunite with family or to find work. Border Angels painted a mural where the wall runs into the water. The mural depicts an Angel watching over people crossing the border. It follows the wall up a small hill and culminates in a section of the wall draped with 4,000 white wooden crosses, one for each known immigrant who died crossing the border since Operation Gate Keeper started in 1994.

Any hang-ups I had previously had about who should or shouldn’t be allowed to come to the U.S. melted away as I learned of Jorge’s family being separated, imprisonment for worshipping with neighbors, and the immigrants who lose their lives seeking a better future. Standing at the border, I had more clarity than ever about what it meant to stand on the side of love.

Lunch time.

I awake at 4:30 AM in Washington, D.C. I brush my teeth, do a quick mental check – passport, phone charger, video camera – got ‘em. Hop in my Prius with the red flames over the wheels and drive to the Baltimore airport. Six very productive hours later (they have internet on planes now!) I’m in San Diego.

Martin Kruming is waiting at the baggage claim for me. I only know him because he told me he’d be wearing a Yankees hat. Martin is passionate about building a network of Unitarian Universalist congregations in the San Diego area to exponentially increase the impact of their social justice work. After I committed to coming to San Diego, Martin ensured that the weekend would be the most action packed and energizing weekend imaginable, both for me and for his fellow San Diego social justice leaders. I was extremely busy working on Valentine’s Day leading up to this trip, so I relied 100% on Martin to arrange my weekends’ activities, accommodations, and transportation. Lucky for me, Martin turns out to be one of the most energetic and talented Unitarian Universalist organizers I’ve ever met, and an incredibly gracious host.

As I’m loading my personal luggage and 44 lbs. of Standing on the Side of Love signs, t-shirts and buttons into his car, I notice that he has some tennis rackets in the trunk. Two hours later I’ve lost three sets, but couldn’t be happier. I’m playing tennis in February!

At 6:30 PM we arrive at First Unitarian Universalist Church of San Diego for a Marriage Equality Mini-Conference. Jan Garbosky and Jonipher Kwong speak before me, between the two of them marriage might as well give up and start including everyone. It is only a matter of time.

I am nearly moved to tears sitting in a room with people who courageously battled against Proposition 8 and continue the fight today. It is more apparent than ever that California ran their own Standing on the Side of Love campaign more than a year before our now iconic black heart was chalked across a vibrant orange canvas. Californian people of faith sang the hymn and rallied around this message of love throughout the entire Prop 8 campaign. It was an anchor of faith and respect in the midst of a storm.

I address the crowd with the respect, energy and enthusiasm they deserve and that I authentically feel. Afterward, I speak with youth looking to take action, a wedding planner looking for more business, and a slew of passionate advocates. All of them are bubbling with enthusiasm for the work of the campaign. They think it is so cool what the campaign is doing and as I stood there underneath a Standing on the Side of Love banner, hugging people who pounded the pavement during prop 8, I also think it is pretty cool what the campaign, what we, are doing.

I leave the church with Martin at 8:30 PM and on the way to my hotel we stop for delicious Thai food. Martin asks if the owner is there so that he can introduce me, something he will do during that weekend at a Mexican restaurant, a downtown cafe, and a Harley Davidson Store – who doesn’t this guy know!

Bedtime.

This video first appeared in the Loudoun Times-Mirror.

I have never fully embraced Valentine’s Day.

When I was single, the day and everything leading up to it, seemed to focus on what I lacked, and I found myself resenting the Hallmark-fueled mandatory expressions of romance.

When John and I met, he was equally ambivalent about Valentine’s Day, preferring to focus his attention on what he felt was a sorely-underrated holiday: Groundhog’s Day.

And so as our relationship unfolded we happily exchanged cards and small gifts on Groundhog’s Day, and then privately snickered as everyone else paid ridiculously inflated prices for flowers and chocolates two weeks later.

But then something happened.

Two beautiful little people came into our world, seemingly on a mission to teach us to see love and beauty everywhere.

Last week as my children made simple, handmade Valentines for their classmates and teachers, I felt my heart soften and embrace the sweetness of what this holiday was — long before it was Mylar balloons, and singing cards, and chocolates wrapped in plastic.

And then yesterday, at our Unitarian Universalist church, as if the service was designed just for me, our minister invited us to re-image Valentine’s day while speaking of the power of love to heal our world.

While I was upstairs singing (I recently re-joined the choir after a 4+ year break — yay!) and enjoying this inspiring service, John and the kids were downstairs in the religious education classrooms making signs to express what love and peace and equality mean to them.

At the end of our service they paraded into the sanctuary carrying their signs and invited us all to join them by marching about a mile from our church to the center of town for a Standing on the Side of Love peace rally.

While we marched I asked Lily what the rally was all about.

“It’s about spreading love, Mama. And brightening people’s days. And being kind to each other. That’s what Valentine’s Day is all about.”

And this is how on a cold, February day, as I stood on the side of the road with my children and more than 80 members of our beautiful spiritual community, smiling and waving our signs as passerbys honked and cheered for equal rights and equal marriage and world peace, I came to know and love and joyfully celebrate the true spirit of Valentine’s Day.

This blog was originally posted on Erin Goodman’s blog, exhale. return to center.

On Sunday, February 14th, the very core of the Standing on the Side of Love campaign came to life. Over 100 communities Reimagined Valentine’s Day and celebrated International Standing on the Side of Love Day. It was a day of worship and action. Each community that participated focused on issues that mattered locally and used tactics that would create change.

Do you want to see what this unique day of action looked like? Check out our photo gallery.

Rev. Theresa Novak and the Unitarian Universalist Church of Ogden, Utah, hosted a town hall style meeting addressing the need for local anti-discrimination ordinances to protect members of the gay, lesbian, bisexual and transgender communities. Rev. Novak said in the Salt Lake Tribune,

Love has the power to transform not only lives, but also society. It is the message of all religions, and one that we all need to remember if we want to call ourselves people of faith. How we treat each other matters.

A young member of the Unitarian Universalist Church of Ogden Stands on the Side of Love.

In Potsdam, the State University of New York hosted a Reimagining Valentine’s Day event where State Assemblywoman Dede Scozzafava, a supporter of marriage equality spoke. Potsdam Rally Co-Organizer Austin Kenyon was quoted on local television news saying,

This weekend is a symbol, it’s done purposefully, to reimagine Valentine’s Day as a holiday. To reimagine it not as just a holiday of candy and Hallmark cards. But as a day of love and acceptance for everyone.

Guest Panel and Organizers of the SUNY Potsdam SSL rally.

At First Parish Cambridge, Unitarian Universalist, in Massachusetts, the congregation held a worship service called, “To Haiti, With Love.” They hosted members of the Haitian Community, filled out postcards in support of comprehensive immigration reform, signed up to volunteer at legal clinics helping Haitian immigrants register for temporary protected status. Then, they capped it all off by singing out their love on the steps of the church.

Dozens of congregations made Valentines for elected officials to ask them to stand on the side of love, or for community members, letting their neighbors know that they are not alone in the struggles they face.

UU Fellowship at Stony Brook children making valentines.

Two ministers, one in Maryland and one in Phoenix, publicly declared they would stop signing marriage licenses until all people could marry whom they love.

Perhaps the most daring event held on February 14th, was in Kampala, Uganda. The Ugandan Parliament is considering passing a bill that would make homosexuality illegal, punishable by imprisonment and, in some cases, death. Rev. Mark Kiyimba, the minister serving the two Ugandan Unitarian Universalist congregations, was the key organizer of the conference called, “Standing on the Side of Love: Reimagining Valentine’s Day.”

Because of the risk involved in hosting or attending such a conference, the exact location wasn’t shared until the last minute and was only shared by word of mouth. Still, over 200 people attended. Pastor Kiyimba, whose church members include many lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgender persons, released a statement to the press saying,

I cannot stand by and watch as my community is exterminated. My church will become illegal and cease to exist if this bill becomes law.

Reimagining Valentine’s Day was covered in dozens of news outlets, including the Washington Post, Huffington Post, Richmond Times-Dispatch, and Beliefnet.com.

Participants also posted their own videos to the web. In Richmond, Virginia gay and lesbian couples applied for marriage licenses and were rejected.

Rev. Nate Walker of the First Unitarian Church in Philadelphia took a page out of Sarah Palin’s book by preaching a Standing on the Side of Love sermon that was written on his hand.

International Standing on the Side of Love Day was an enormous step forward for the Standing on the Side of Love Campaign. We definitively proved that you don’t need a single issue, goal, or tactic to build a movement. All you need is a singular value that thousands of people will boldly weave into the fabric of their communities. That value is love and boy do we have it.

Don’t forget to check out our photo gallery, to get a sense for how many communities across the nation participated. You can add your photos there as well!

My congregation had an amazing service yesterday that focused on Haiti and on standing with immigrant families here in the United States. Community partners from the Haitian Coalition were in attendance. We collected Valentine’s Day cards made by UU Mass Action to send to our legislators for Comprehensive Immigration Reform. People signed up to participate in Temporary Protected Status Legal clinics sponsored by the UUA & UUSC and partners. People also signed up to go as a congregation for a Walk for Haiti in March sponsored by the Haitian Coalition that will raise funds to rebuild schools in Haiti. The religious education classes made valentines for Partners in Health and read Circles of Hope – a story about Haiti. The youth group sold t-shirts for the walk (1/2 the sales go to Partners in Health or you got a free t-shirt if you promised to get sponsors for your walk).

Rev. Fred Small preached a truly amazing sermon on Haiti – managing to give ‘a people’s history of Haiti’ in the context of worship and rousing folks to love and action. Truly standing on the side of love. We sang “Stand” by Amy Carol Webb in the worship service, the choir sang a Haitian ballad, and the congregation sang a calypso Alleluia. At the end of the service after eveyone had a chance to eat Haitian cake in the parlor, speak with our guests (a number of people from the Haitian community came to the service as well as the folks who work at the Coalition) and sign up for the TPS legal clinics and the walk (along with turnng in cards for CIR) – we all went out on to the front steps of the church – holding the Standing on the Side of Love Banner – and singing ‘Stand’ with Rev. Small playing guitar and singing the verses. The moment was magical, folks were filled with love, and passersby stopped to listen and cheer us on. We’re now thinking we could do this once a month around various standing on the side of love justice issues as a form of public witness.

News coverage of this courageous action appeared in the Richmond Times-Dispatch.

This weekend we are standing on the side of love all across the world. Yesterday interfaith advocates spoke to the media in the capitol rotunda in St. Paul, Minnesota.

The buzz is building. Love is on the march. Are you wondering what this looks like? Well here are some early photos below. Don’t you forget to upload your photos directly to our website.

The SSL banner unfurled in the MN Capitol rotunda

Des Moines, IA SSL Party 2/6/10

UUs in Canton, NY Standing on the Side of Love

Tomorrow, early in the morning! That’s when the Minnesota Standing on the Side of Love event takes place, early in the line up of over 100 such events across the nation which will unfold through the weekend!

Here, SSL is joining a broad interfaith rally at the Capitol Rotunda to encourage legislators to support marriage equality, so that Minnesotans don’t need to take buses to Iowa in order to get legally married. We want Minnesota to be the progressive beacon we know it is, and to dare to take action on behalf of equality under the law for all of its citizens.

I’m thrilled to join such national figures as Bishop Yvette Flunder (City of Refuge UCC), Rev. Elder Nancy Wilson (Moderator of the Metropolitan Community Church), and other religious and elected officials, representing Standing on the Side of Love. I’m scheming to have the banner there and highly visible. I’m thinking through what to say in my three minutes in the sun!

I love all of the ripples that spread out over the waters from this one event. Ripples which extend out to hold a wide variety of religious people, who share the same conviction about marriage equality. Ripples which extend out to a national day of love and justice which 100 other religious communities are committing themselves to in a wide variety of arenas, and even to Uganda, where people of faith will stand on the side of love in the face of draconian legislation against glbt people.

In such moments, when we experience being one people, I feel that I am living my religious mission. We all know that the forces of hate and fear are strong. Here’s our chance to know that the force of love, when we stand on the side of love, is even stronger.