Posts Tagged ‘bullying’

UUs in Westchester & Rockland, NY Support PrideWorks for Youth

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PrideWorks is a prominent educational conference for LGBTQ youth and their allies, held annually in Westchester County, New York. Every year, some 600 LGBTQ youth, their educators, parents, and allies flock to PrideWorks for seminars and speakers addressing such topics as healthy relationships, coming out, anti-bullying, and building a gay-straight alliance.

Every year there are also protesters outside the conference. This year their message was one of change–not for themselves but instead that our youth should change their sexual orientation. We are bothered every year by their presence as it’s the first thing that the youth see as they arrive. This year we offered a different greeting with a Standing on the Side of Love banner, which the youth appreciated enthusiastically.

Offering a message of love instead of hate as the youth arrive.

Now in its fourteenth year, many Unitarian Universalist youth and adults in our area have attended the PrideWorks conference since the beginning. Some time ago, the youth group from our congregation in Hastings on Hudson held a fundraiser to support the conference, becoming the first UU supporter listed in the program. Over the past year, we have organized a bigger presence at PrideWorks. Each of the congregations in Westchester and Rockland obtained governing board approval to be an official sponsor and raised funds in some fashion, ranging from a youth group bake sale to share-the-plate programs.

SSL volunteers from Westchester-area congregations.

This year, we were a “Rainbow Circle” supporter–recognized prominently with a display table to provide supportive material to youth. Many of us wore our Standing on the Side of Love shirts to help spread love all weekend long.


This post was contributed by John Cavallero, the Director of Religious Education at the First Unitarian Society of Westchester in Hastings on Hudson, New York. Other participating UU congregations include: Mohegan Lake, Croton on Hudson, Mount Kisco, White Plains, and Pomona.

Texas High School Students Speak Out Against Bullying

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The students of Cypress Ranch High School in Cypress, Texas got together last month to film an original Lip Dub video speaking out against bullying in their community. The video begins with a young man standing up for a fellow student and then erupts into a song recorded by a Cypress Ranch student entitled “Who Do U Think U R?” The camera follows various students through the halls, passing pass classmates holding signs that read “Stop the Hate,” “I am proud to be me,” “Choir stands against bullying,” and others. In the video’s description, the Cy Ranch students declared, “we’d love this video to help make a difference and to enforce that we, the students, the teens, want bullying to stop!”

Moreover, the entire project was student-led. Every step of production, from writing and directing to filming and editing, was done by Cy Ranch students. What an amazing group of teenager. Thank you, Cypress Ranch High School, for standing on the side of love!

Check it out here:

Day 17: A Day to Help Teachers Combat Bullying

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The message below went out on Wednesday, February 1, 2012 to those Standing on the Side of Love supporters who signed up for daily Thirty Days of Love emails. You can sign-up for the 30 Days of Love emails here.


Combating bullying is not simple, and has no easy fix. Bullying-related suicides, especially of LGBT-identified young people, have been prominent in the news cycles over the past couple of years.

I’m sure you know some of the oft-repeated statistics:

  • Suicide is the third leading cause of death among 15 to 24-year-olds
  • LGBT youth are up to four times more likely to attempt suicide than their heterosexual peers.
  • Nine out of 10 LGBT students report experiencing harassment at school

Of course, bullying affects far more than just LGBT-identified young people. There are now increasing reports of Latino/a youth and Muslim youth being targeted. And sadly, many of us may have experienced bullying for a whole host of reasons, both as youngsters and as adults.

Our society’s culture of bullying is a plague that has taken hold in our nation’s schools and finds its roots at the very seat of power—just look at some of the political campaign rhetoric.

Today, we address bullying together and say “no more.”

Help teachers combat bullying by supporting anti-bullying projects across the country that require funding. Click here to find projects on Donors Choose that need support.

DonorsChoose.org is an online charity connecting donors to classrooms in need. Public school teachers post classroom project requests on the site, and potential donors can browse projects and give any amount to the one or more that inspires you. There are several projects related to bullying. For example:

“Help Us Teach Kids Ways to Prevent Bullying,” Brownville School, Maine
Ms. Bowden’s students write and perform puppet shows on ways to prevent bullying. The kids really enjoy using puppets, but the student puppeteers have a hard time speaking loud enough for others to hear. Ms. Bowden is collecting donations to buy microphones so the students’ projects will have a more meaningful impact.

“Deep Down, We Have So Much in Common!” Stratton Meadows School, Colorado Springs
Mrs. P’s creative idea combines anti-bullying, team building, and science curricula to give her students opportunities to build community and talk about the things we all have in common (even down to the cellular level!). She needs your donations to help buy books on bullying, microscopes, and an array of slides that will show her students that deep down we are all the same.

Click here to find projects on Donors Choose related to combating bullying that need support.

And visit http://www.donorschoose.org/about to learn how the organizations ensure integrity in the donation process.

Sometimes, it’s the simple ‘we do’ that can have a big impact – such as helping one dedicated teacher, one classroom, one young person at a time.

We hope today’s action will bring you inspiration, and a sense of comfort that together, we can make things better for young people trying to make their way in the world with the happiness and self-esteem they deserve.

In partnership for a more loving world,

Dan Furmansky
Campaign Manager

P.S. The Trevor Project is the leading national organization providing crisis intervention and suicide prevention services to lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender, and questioning youth. Consider familiarizing yourself with this organization and its projects: http://www.thetrevorproject.org/

Honoring the Day of Silence

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Today is the National Day of Silence. On the National Day of Silence hundreds of thousands of students nationwide take a vow of silence to bring attention to anti-LGBT name-calling, bullying and harassment in their schools.

As a small way of supporting all of those students who are taking action, we offer this video.

Ahmir, billed as ‘the most popular R&B group on You Tube,’ effectively takes on bullying with this catchy, heartfelt Pink tribute.

The lyrics say it all:

“Pretty, pretty please…don’t you ever ever feel…like you’re less than…less than perfect…pretty pretty please if you ever ever feel…like you’re nothing…you are perfect…to me.”

The Great Bobble-head Saga

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Post by John Bohstedt, Tennessee Valley UU Church in Knoxville.


Four days after the horrific shootings in Tucson, TV news reported that a local firing range, “Fabulous Firearms,” run by Brent Wilson, had advertised a unique fund-raiser for the next Saturday (Jan. 15). For $5, shooters could fire at one of two bobble-head dolls (8” high), the proceeds going to the Second Harvest Food Bank. The bobble-heads were anything but anonymous: they were dolls of Lane Kiffin and his father, Monte Kiffin, former University of Tennessee football coaches despised by fans for having abruptly left our program for the rosier climes of Southern Cal. So fans could get their anger out while contributing to a worthy cause, Wilson announced.

That shocked us – just as the nation plunged into a furious debate over the role of vitriolic rhetoric in contributing to our nation’s long history of public shootings, people were invited to enjoy shooting at effigies of living public figures! At Tennessee Valley Unitarian Universalist Church (Knoxville), we have wanted to reduce violent political rhetoric ever since our own Church shootings in 2008. “Our” shooter’s four-page manifesto explained in detail that “This was a hate crime, ” “This was a political protest,” “This was a symbolic killing.” Since he could not get at the liberal elites listed in Bernard Goldberg’s 100 People Who Are Screwing Up America, he would shoot their local supporters. His letter echoed familiar hate- radio themes, and incendiary books that the police found in his home: Michael Savage, Liberalism is a Mental Disorder; Sean Hannity, Let Freedom Ring: Winning the War of Liberty over Liberalism; Bill O’Reilly, The O’Reilly Factor: The Good, the Bad, and the Completely Ridiculous in American Life. He carried 70 high-powered shells, and evidently planned to keep shooting until he was killed by the police. Instead he was tackled by five parishioners.

Bobble-head dolls of ex-UTK coaches Lane & Monte Kiffin, as portrayed online. (Thanks to Ted Lollis)Bobble-head dolls of ex-UTK coaches Lane & Monte Kiffin, as portrayed online. (Thanks to Ted Lollis)

In the last five years of hate-radio’s and TV’s competitions in outrage, “trigger-words” have become common in political diatribes. By trigger-words I mean direct calls for physical violence such as: “They oughta be hanged!” “Just shoot him!” “Beat him up!” “Kick them out,” “Make them afraid to leave their home,” and so on. Because our shooter’s expressed motivations reproduced such rhetoric, many TVUUCers believed – not that such words alone “caused” shootings – but rather that they gave public currency to the idea of physically attacking a political opponent, formulated as a suggestion – not to every listener, but to someone already living in a delusional world who heard the TV or the dog talking directly to him.

We felt the Great Bobble-head Shoot would affirm the legitimacy of murderous rhetoric about celebrities. Indeed, some of Wilson’s fans joked on Facebook about shooting at Obama dolls! So we called for a ban on talk of physical violence against political opponents, not by state fiat but by leadership.

TVUUC members did several things. As a spirited discussion began on our own e-list, Ted Jones & Bill Fields drafted a resolution for the TVUUC Board that would “respectfully ask the Unitarian Universalist Association that the Standing of the Side of Love initiative make the issue of public speech that contributes to violence one of their campaigns.” The motion was circulated and unanimously endorsed by our Board. Meanwhile Ted Jones and John Bohstedt began conversations about actions with Dan Furmansky, director of SSL. Partly as a result of those conversations, SSL posted a web-page that enabled voters to ask their Congressmen to renounce “vitriolic rhetoric.” Dan accepted Ted Lollis’s invitation to give a forum on his work at SSL, the weekend of the UUA’s National Day of Standing on the Side of Love, featuring associated UU events across the country. Rev. Chris Buice of TVUUC organized an interfaith panel for that afternoon to discuss “Standing on the Side of Love: Spiritual Approaches to Polarized Politics.”

John Bohstedt and several others emailed the director of Second Harvest Food Bank (with which we had collaborated for years), and asked them to sever their relationship with the shooting fund-raiser. We committed to raising the money to replace the $2000 they anticipated from the shooting event. (Note: The event had been planned weeks before Tucson). After receiving a number of friendly suggestions from TVUUCers, and angry blasts from some others, Second Harvest announced they had severed their link to the shooting event. We promptly raised the money. More than $4000 came in within 24 hours (from TVUUC and our networks of allies). A Sunday Special Collection at TVUUC harvested $1700 more. A second charity also declined connection with the shooting event.

Meanwhile, several of us also began to email the owner of Fabulous Firearms, Brent Wilson, explaining our feelings to him. In several exchanges he responded cordially, though noting that “we are worlds apart in our beliefs.” Indeed we were: in religion; in the possible role of rhetoric in violence; and in his view that we hypocritically accepted the “genocide of babies.” He thought the notion that shooting at dolls “caused” murders was idolatrous, satanic and sick. Nevertheless, he moved from using bobble-head targets to clay pigeons to paper targets, joking “as long as the tree-huggers don’t come after me.” He described this as “a compromise, but not a capitulation.” As he explained to his fans who accused him of “caving in:” We critics were not anti-gun, but “when it comes to people who for whatever reason were really distressed that we might shoot a likeness of a human – well one can’t argue with that.”

I call that a brave and generous response.

We did not change Brent and his supporters. We did not try to. We expressed our views frankly, however much they might conflict, with enough respect to keep the conversation going, recognizing that we remained “worlds apart.” It seemed in the end that, while compromise on principles was unlikely or even undesirable, it was possible to find common ground on a specific action, perhaps on unexpected bases.

Epilogue: The day of the event, Ted Jones led a Bobble-head Rescue. He collected $5s and “saved” several dolls, together with a paper target. (Of course they were silhouettes!) But it felt like a win-win-win that achieved satisfactory outcomes for all three parties, while humiliating or antagonizing none.


Below are links to news broadcasts about the Bobble-Head events, collected by Ted Lollis, Coordinator of Forums at TVUUC, and posted on his web-site, along with many other resources related to our fora, TVUUC, and peace movements.

LANE KIFFIN BOBBLEHEAD DOLLS

"Kingston gun shop hosts bobblehead shooting day for Kiffin’s anniversary," WATE-TV, Jan. 12, 2011. (2:21)

"Shoot at a Lane Kiffin bobblehead gets mixed reviews from locals," WBIR-TV, Jan. 13, 2011. (1:49)

"Food bank pulls out of Kingston gun shop’s Kiffin bobblehead shooting day," WATE-TV, Jan. 13?, 2011. (1:32)

"Statement issued by Frontier Firearms about Kiffin bobblehead event," WATE-TV, Jan. 13, 2011.

"Firing range cancels ‘Shoot at a Lane Kiffin Bobblehead’ event," WBIR-TV, Jan. 14, 2011. (1:49)

"Kingston gun shop cancels Kiffin bobblehead shooting day." WATE-TV, Jan. 14, 2011.